my youtube story

My Youtube Story

YouTube served as my digital mentor during my awakening process, guiding me through various rabbit holes and fueled my journey. If it wasn’t for YouTube, my life would be a lot different right now. I went down so many rabbit holes with YouTube. I will put it on my list to write a YouTube rabbit hole list someday.  Stay tuned. ❤️

I heard Youtube was a good way to advertise your business.

I started YouTube for the same reason many people do, or at least Realtors like me; I wanted to make money and sell houses. Since YouTube is the ‘second largest search engine,’ I thought I would use it to promote my business, get clients, and make money. So, my real estate research led me to start a channel – after all, it was free advertising, and I could hone in on exploring Las Vegas. I could increase views, thereby increasing clients and potential sales, and I didn’t have to pay the evil Zillow empire for leads. So, I started a YouTube channel for my Las Vegas Real Estate Company, Vivid Realty.  It seems easy enough. Except there was one problem.

I was awkward and self conscious

I was not cool in front of the camera. I was pretty terrible and awkward. I had no confidence in front of the camera and was super self-aware. So I wanted to get better. I read a tip once about just doing everything before a running camera. So that is what I did. I set up a camera and OBS on my computer and recorded everything. And I mean everything – therapy, talking on the phone, even working at my desk in lingerie. But it still was hard for me to talk about real estate, even though I’d been doing it for over 20 years. I think that is because I wasn’t passionate about the topic, and it wasn’t my purpose. So I decided to make another channel where I could talk about something that maybe was more ‘casual’ of a topic.

I made a channel about Kate

I made a channel about Kate. At this time in my life, I was not just a real estate broker but also a $ 600-an-hour escort in Las Vegas. I had already been on a few podcasts as my escort persona, Kate Layne. One night at about 3 am, after coming off a mushroom trip at about 3 am, I did a Google search for Kate. I found an interview I had done with the Jeff Does Vegas podcast on his YouTube channel had over 25,000 views and a lot of lovely comments, so I thought if he could get those numbers on my interview (and at the time, it was his top listened to podcast, as well as for Sunny and Ken. People wanted to hear what I had to say. So, in the middle of the night, I started a YouTube channel and recorded and posted my first video. I think I called it ‘Kate Layne chats,’ So I continued that for a while, working on the ‘Kate’ channel. I was leaning towards a podcast and purchased the equipment to make one. This was about the time I began therapy. I made some videos, a dirty one talking about a Reddit user’s escort experience and some others.

Breaking free of TV's Influence

At the time, I was getting tired of television. So, I made a video of things I thought would be cool to see if I was high or tripping or feeling meditative. I didn’t want to see ads or get some programming; I didn’t want to feel the emotions the show’s producers were trying to manipulate out of me. So, I created a video called Watch While High. I used that video to try to increase the viewing time on my channel. I played it on three TVs and a projector most days. This is when I started to awaken, and I had a lot of colorful lights going on in my house. I would move from room to room and have this video playing everywhere. I had my new puppy through this time, and I was going through my awakening, doing a lot of psilocybin therapy and living in kaftans. My house was a disaster, I was a disaster, and for a while I thought I’d be embarrassed to show it. But this part is all part of my story too and will likely be in a lot of future vidoes. But you know, that was my life at the time.  I’ve gotten past it.  Sometimes things have to fall apart before they get put together, and exactly that happened. 

A Raven's help from across the Globe

So, I have the new channel. The Kate channel. I was making a mix of videos – and I had the Vivid Realty Channel. I was doing a lot of driving tours and putting those out. They sucked. But I didn’t care; I was still getting videos out for my real estate company. I was still awkard in front of the camera, and I was making the ‘watch while high videos,’ around this time, I hired Raven. Raven was my virtual assistant based in the Philippines. I hired him at the beginning of my awakening. I will save most of the Raven story for another time because he deserves his own story. But as I started this process, giving that job to Raven and having him as my assistant was a big part of my journey. I needed to go through what I needed to go through, and I needed help. I was having a lot of focus and concentration issues from the awakening process. Raven was there to ground me and give me a purpose. So, Raven edited many of my videos, and then I reviewed them and sent him instructions on how I wanted things edited. As things progressed with my awakening, it was harder and harder for me to work, but Raven kept my videos going. Eventually, I had more relaxation, meditation, and ‘get high’ videos on my channel than Kate’s.

It ended too soon.

About a year ago I had to end his employment because I could not afford it anymore. I feel wrong about how it ended, but I think I’ve figured out how to turn that around. I have an excellent project idea in the works. This part of my story is incomplete – stay tuned.

Just ‘Call me Kate’

I felt like I wouldn’t be Kate Layne forever, so I changed my channel name to ‘Call me Kate.’ I was still unsure what to do about not showing my face, but as more and more people watched my relaxation videos, I decided to focus on that.

Coming Out as Kate

In March 2023, I told everyone I was an escort and started changing my name on social media to my real name, Courtney. I changed the channel to ‘Authentic Courtney’ but the content was the same. On all social platforms, I use some form of Authentic Courtney. Then, on October 23, one of my relaxation films got a lot of attention and views and was blowing up. I realized everything on that channel that wasn’t relaxation or visually related needed to go.

A new home for Authentic Courtney

I made my Authentic Courtney channel and moved everything. I remember being so scared to do this. That it would be a huge step backwards, and I’d have to do all the hard work to monetize the channel again But when you got down to it, it didn’t hurt it and actually helped grow the new ‘old’ channel now called Psychedelic Zen.

Psychedelic Zen was born

Finally with my Kate content and Authentic Courtney content off of the channel we could finally give the channel a name it deserved and ‘Psychedelic Zen’ was born.

I made this move on October 23, 2023, with 1437 followers and 74.3 views. Today, I have 4,234 subscribers and 721,351 views. That’s an increase of 2.8k subscribers and 647,000 views. That was a good move!

Need. More. Channels.

So now, in my story, I have told you about my three original YouTube channels: the Vivid Realty channel—which I abandoned because it was mostly awkward; Psychedelic Zen, my meditative, trippy visuals channel; and Authentic Courtney. But I have a few more.

But Wait. There's more.


Chuey’s Big Adventure @ChueyLove I spent the last two years mostly in solitude with my dog, and I was an aspiring YouTube channel. I have so much video footage of my dog. He’s so cute, and I have a lot of footage as my best friend. Why not make a channel out of it? Bonus: Chuey likes to watch TV and especially loves to watch himself.

And More


It’s no surprise that I grew my own plant medicine. I started this channel when I was starting channels to try to get more comfortable. I’m a bit awkward here, and there is at least one video I was on shrooms on. I will likely resurrect this channel when I have a place to grow again. In the meantime, I am trying to persuade Anders to do some smoking sessions with me for that channel. I think I’ll make a date night out of it and experiment.

Authentically Me


This is my main channel.  My channel.  Probably the one that is nearest and dearest to my heart. It’s the one I take personally as hell because it’s ME.  It’s not a product I sell or a story I fake, But my life.  I know my purpose is to tell my story. I want to share my experience, learn, and remind people of what life is supposed to be.  I’m supposed to remind you that nature is the real life.  I’m telling my story of where I was and where I’m going and sharing the story of my recreation here.  This is personal and the biggest project I’ve ever undertaken.  I know I’ll succeed, but there’s a slight probability I’ll fail at some things. But I’m going to share it all.  I’m recreating my life, and that’s not for wussies. The last two years have prepared for this.  I’m here now.  Watch me grow.

I got a tremendous idea!

Make. More. Channels.

In the past few weeks, I have been working on how to recreate my life.  I got a tremendous idea.  MAKE MORE CHANNELS!  And here is why.  I have ADHD.  I like to be busy.  I get bored if Im not thinking of multiple things at once. Over the past two years, I have over 15,000 videos and more pictures in my archive.  Going through my archive makes posting to multiple channels easier than concentrating on one topic.  I’m not neurotypical, and I never had a one-track mind.  So, I started a nature channel and an ant channel. Yeah, I know.  Ants. I’ll get to that. Now I can go through my video archive file by file and push them to whatever channel I need to. It works for me, and it’s making my life more fun. 

So I did!


I spend a lot of time outdoors.  I live in an RV and currently, we are living in a *very nature-y* place,  there’s a lot of wildlife.  There’s also a lot of sky cover; we are in a valley in a thick mesquite forest, and there are few rock-hounding opportunities without driving somewhere.  I film as much nature as I can.  It finally occurred to me, what exactly am I doing, hoarding all of these experiences myself?  And ‘Wild About Nature’ was born.  It’s fun because most videos are things I’ve taken throughout my journey but haven’t used them for anything and now they have a purpose. Now this channel is helping me stay in the moment and be mindful because I’m always hunting for something to shoot (with my camera, that is)

Because we travel it’s interesting to experience different ecosystems and now that we are near a river we see even more exciting wildlife. Immersing myself in nature has really helped my awakening experience.

Ants. Really?


Ants. I know.  It seems wild.  But have you ever actually watched Ants?  Well, there are a lot of ants where I am right now, and I find them interesting enough to watch an hour-long documentary about them. Now, I’m even more fascinated by them. 

Despite their small size, ants showcase remarkable complexity and societal organization, offering a window into intricate systems and behaviors. Studying ants unveils insights into collective intelligence, division of labor, and problem-solving strategies. Their resilience, adaptability, and cooperation inspire admiration and curiosity. Some find spiritual symbolism in their diligent work ethic and interconnectedness, seeing parallels with human endeavors and the universe’s interconnected web. Observing ants can teach valuable lessons about teamwork, perseverance, and resourcefulness, urging us to appreciate the marvels of nature and the significance of community bonds in our lives.

A Big Idea

Never Stop Learning or Growing!

So, here’s my idea.  I continue to create channels about whatever I’m hyperfocusing on.  (ADHD, if you know you know.)  So I learn, grow, and share, and when the channel and idea start generating interest and enough funds to keep it afloat, we continue to create videos but hire a virtual assistant so that I can delegate some work.  That gives me an opportunity to help someone around the world, like they helped me before and we all grow together.   It’ll give someone a good job and a better life; I learn, they learn, we learn, and we all grow.  That’s my plan.  I’m starting my plan with the mentioned channels, but there will be more.  Stay tuned, and if there’s something you want to pitch, please send me an email.

My Dude

He deserves his own section.

When I met Anders, he didn’t have a computer.  I gifted him my old laptop.  He was super excited about it.  I remember him saying, I always wanted a laptop.  Within a short time Anders started his own channel, Dirt and Demolition. 

When we met,  Anders had a lot of anxiety and depression and he is worlds apart from that person now.  He has been amazing helping me with learning how to deal with ADHD and a lot of what I’ve gone through.  We spent a lot of time watching How to YouTube channels together and he is always down to hash ideas with me.  When I spend days on end hyperfocused on a task, he takes care of us and is always supportive. He gets me and I’m so grateful to have him. ❤️

So. Many. Ideas.

I'm just getting Started!

I have so many ideas up my sleeves, even though I’m just rolling out this website, and I’m thinking about how I’m recreating myself and how I can help others along the way. Stay tuned because I will have opportunities to get involved, sponsor, and support my efforts.